Dec 9, 2021
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A Weekend of mini-adventures and spontaneous experiences
This leads me to the theme for this episode. Are you IN the arena?
One of the pivotal moments for me in my parenting and adventure journey was listening to Brene Brown on a podcast. She shared her discovery of the Teddy Roosevelt The Man in the Arena quote and how it led to her writing Daring Greatly. A little backdrop on the quote. I have long been a fan of Teddy Roosevelt and this summer visited Teddy Roosevelt National Park in North Dakota which led to additional learning and curiosity. The Man in the Arena quote is from a speech that Teddy Roosevelt gave in Paris in 1910 called Citizenship in a Republic. Roosevelt was addressing the roles of citizenship and called out the voices of cynicism dissuades many from doing great things (Source: https://www.mentalfloss.com/article/63389/roosevelts-man-arena among others)
The quote states:
"It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better. The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives val-e-antly; who errs, who comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do the deeds; who knows great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who neither know victory nor defeat."
I remember hearing this recited on the podcast as I drove home from work one day. I was living life on drift and thought “oh crap, I’m not in the arena.” The truth was not many in my circle, my network had the same parenting adventure desires that I had. Yet I listened to their worries, their concerns and need for safety and stability kept me in the cheap seats. The cheap seats of the dreamers and the talkers. The doers of deeds are in the arena getting dirty.
As I traversed down the trail of being a parent who is willing to adventure and take risks it often felt lonely, that the voices of the critics were loud. When I set out on this podcast I had an intention to find others who were ahead of me on this trail. Who were already in the arena or were willing to join me in the arena and share triumphs or failures while daring greatly. I have participated in numerous parenting groups, I’ve joined masterminds and signed up for online courses, and while those were great in building a more diverse set of experiences and connections, by and large the adventure parenting arena still feels pretty lonely with quite a few eager but timid souls sitting in the seats waiting and watching.
There is a chapter in my upcoming book about building and creating an adventure tribe or a circle of trusted adventure advisors which was inspired by Pat Flynn and reinforced by John Lee Doumas if you are familiar with any of their work. Pat suggests when he was launching his business that he needed a different trusted circle of advisors that were not merely friends, but rather skilled advisors he trusted much like his financial advisor, legal counsel who were vested in his personal and professional goals. People who could test him still came from a caring place and had his best interests in mind. Who could connect with him in the pits when things weren’t going well and share honest feedback not just try to make him feel good, but actually improve. The advice I took from John Lee Doumas was to find a mentor who is one year ahead of where you want to be and invest in them, learn from them, do whatever you can to get access to their content. Surround yourself with people who have more experience than you. I think it was Shane Sams who said, your goal is to be the dumbest person in the room and just soak up and learn from others, you want to be in the room where it happens (feel free to break out in Hamilton song if you haven't already)
When I encounter a problem is A) Find a solution B) Create a solution C) Let the problem go. We have some pretty Brave and Bold adventure family goals that we are embarking on in 2022 that I am not willing to let go of. I have yet to find a solution after several years of searching so I think that leads to answer B) Create a Solution. I have been searching for a community where I can learn from others on this adventure journey, who are in the arena. Who don’t merely talk about their goals and dreams but get marred with dust and blood taking action. They spend their time and energy on a worthy cause trying to design a life they want to live. I have found a few families who do this well and I want to bring them to the community, to do deep dives and masterminds so we can interact and bring their experiences and lessons learned to the arena. Where we don’t merely have to sit in the cheap seats. A reference to my teaching in-service days, I’m not interested in offering “a sit n’ get” experience, but rather get in the arena. Try different suits of armor on, get dirty, fall down, go forward with great enthusiasm knowing that there are 20+ other adventurous parents in the arena with you. I want to bring you the members of my trusted advisor circle who help me through mindset, and money, setting expectations, working through self-doubt and fear; while also helping you build yours in the process. I want the arena to not only inspire and support you but also keep you accountable.
I have also heard from my everyday adventure challenge cohorts, the simplicity is great AND Several of them have big bold ideas that need more depth, more planning support, more insights and if they had someone to help them predict and navigate the Black Swan events they would gladly sign up for this experience. Some examples of “in the Arena” experiences that I know people in the Ordinary Sherpa community are working towards:
All of these are worthwhile lifestyle experiences that can be achieved within the next 6-12 months. I will admit while none of the adventure goals above are mine. But we do have a bold family adventure goal for 2022. The kind that has me both excited and scared at the same time. Having a tribe of advisors and curious supporters willing to embark on a Bold and Brave in 2022 feels good. SO here is the official announcement of the In the Arena membership that will launch in January 2022. I am keeping it a closed group with about 20-30 people max in it and I know many don’t listen to these podcasts the week they come out so I wanted to give you the time to think about it and consider applying. If you are intrigued and simply want to be on the waitlist or know more details head over to ordinarysherpa.com/arena
All that does is put your name on maybe/want more information list, when you sign up you will receive more information and a link to an application. I will be scheduling a call with every applicant and treating this experience like an adventure lifestyle mastermind to help you achieve your lifestyle and adventure family goals in 2022.
I am kind of excited about the arena, but I also want to be really clear that it’s not just about the service offering. THe arean can exist wherever you want it to exist and sometimes it really is the simple things like I experienced this weekend. SItting in the house watching my kids play outside. Outside and play are critical to every human being, not just kids. I want you to notice, where are you sitting in the cheap seats and when are you in the arena getting dirty. Because regardless if the result is victory or failure, at least you are taking a step towards action.
May this episode inspire you to take a step in the arena and know what matters is not the outcome, but that you are IN the ARENA.
Until next time we are over here
rooting you on. I can’t wait to see and hear what little
adventures you are doing, and what bold and brave experiences you
are designing for 2022. Keep that adventurous and festive
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